YO HI AMIGOS
It’s been a little while since I’ve given anyone who cares other than my Mum a life update so here it is. I’ve been BUSY for the first time in a long time writing for companies and LOVING what I’m doing. I fell into this randomly whilst travelling the world, as a creative tool of expressing myself and my fears. It turns out people liked reading what I was writing (who knew?) and I’m lucky that I’m now pursuing something I want to make an even bigger career out of.
I’ve been in London since March when COVID decided to wreck lives, end lives and disrupt them beyond belief. I’m fully aware of the destruction it causes and CAN cause to families and my heart goes out to those that are suffering. I will continue to scowl in disbelief at “influencers” who are so unbelievably selfish that they legitimately boast about masks ruining their makeup. That type of sh*t makes me question the real goodness in humanity. Anyway, silly humans aside, I have no qualms in wearing masks and having to wait & see if I’m going to be allowed back to Australia where a big box of my stuff awaits. Truth be told, I’m actually okay staying in London, being with friends, going to therapy for the time being and working on things I’ve clearly had nearly 2 years to escape from. I’m proud of that, it’s not easy but eventually it has to be done-you cannot run away from your sh*t forever.
For the first time in a long time, I’m feeling better about myself. It’s been a difficult few weeks in terms of disordered eating thoughts making an appearance. There’s been days I’ve had to try and breathe through what normally would be punishing acts but I’ve done it.I’m slowly learning how to let them pass without feeling a need to react. This might result in anxiety but that’s huge progress.
I’m also VERY proud of something else. I got broken up with 2 months ago at the height of the pandemic with nothing more than a text and a refusal to chat. It took good friends to remind me of my worth and NOW I realise – I don’t need to settle for immaturity or blame myself for another person’s faults. I deserve the damn best there is because I am worthy. And that is a f*cking awesome feeling 💪